Strategically Planted Car Bomb Ends Democratic Revolution in Middle East
Fallujah, Iraq - A strategically placed car bomb exploded in Fallujah yesterday bringing a dramatic end to the rise of democracy in the war torn region. The bomb, which caused minor injuries to several nearby, exploded in front of an Iraqi market.
According to Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, insurgents detonated the bomb sending a clear message to the United States.
"The terrorists win. We give up. We thought there was no way but its obvious now that they mean business. They've gone to blowing up Volvos. We never thought they would resort to that."
President Bush spoke from the Rose Garden on Friday morning and announced his Roadmap to Retreat.
"It has been my policy since 9/11 to face the new realities of the 21st Century with a quiet unyielding resolve and to realize that we face a new world with new challenges. But I did not expect them to blow up Volvos...holy cow. Citing this new unprecedented wave of attacks, I am withdrawing all our forces immediately. We are going to leave the Middle East to fall into ruin. After all, they won't bother us all the way over here on the other side of the ocean will they? Oh, wait. They already did," he said.
Response to the attack was almost immediate throughout the Middle East. One Iraqi store owner named Hamad I'Slamad seemed fearful.
"When the bomb went off I thought 'oh no' they did it. They blew up a Volvo. The Americans will leave for sure now," he said.
Effects of the bomb were far reaching. Blossoming democracies throughout the Middle East were truncated by the strategic bombing, sending shockwaves of fear and uncertainty throughout the region.
"I always said, 'if [the insurgents] blew up enough cars the democratic revolution would end. We always knew that something as small as one car bomb could permenantly squash the internal desire for freedom that dwells within all people," I'Slamad said.
Bush added that his Administration might attempt to alter the destiny of the world through the spread of democracy "again next year."
According to Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, insurgents detonated the bomb sending a clear message to the United States.
"The terrorists win. We give up. We thought there was no way but its obvious now that they mean business. They've gone to blowing up Volvos. We never thought they would resort to that."
President Bush spoke from the Rose Garden on Friday morning and announced his Roadmap to Retreat.
"It has been my policy since 9/11 to face the new realities of the 21st Century with a quiet unyielding resolve and to realize that we face a new world with new challenges. But I did not expect them to blow up Volvos...holy cow. Citing this new unprecedented wave of attacks, I am withdrawing all our forces immediately. We are going to leave the Middle East to fall into ruin. After all, they won't bother us all the way over here on the other side of the ocean will they? Oh, wait. They already did," he said.
Response to the attack was almost immediate throughout the Middle East. One Iraqi store owner named Hamad I'Slamad seemed fearful.
"When the bomb went off I thought 'oh no' they did it. They blew up a Volvo. The Americans will leave for sure now," he said.
Effects of the bomb were far reaching. Blossoming democracies throughout the Middle East were truncated by the strategic bombing, sending shockwaves of fear and uncertainty throughout the region.
"I always said, 'if [the insurgents] blew up enough cars the democratic revolution would end. We always knew that something as small as one car bomb could permenantly squash the internal desire for freedom that dwells within all people," I'Slamad said.
Bush added that his Administration might attempt to alter the destiny of the world through the spread of democracy "again next year."
posted by Winston A. Hall at 11:11 AM
4 Comments:
are you kidding..get a life man
are you kidding..get a life man
"Youareanidiot." You intrigue me. Truly. Let's come out from behind the curtain. Who are you? I've had to put more thought into my blog as of late than I did almost the entirety of my college career. Quite honestly, I'm getting a kick out of it. Thanks for making me think again. This blog was supposed to be for fun and now its turning into work! ha ha
p.s. Can you change your user name? "Youareanidiot" is very harsh. How about "yourblogisunlikeanyblogiveeverreadbefore." It has a nice ring to it.
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